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ARE YOU WEARING YOUR SCARF?

Astoria, NY - Blizzard of 1996

Astoria, NY – Blizzard of 1996

I've always really loved scarfs.  I think my fascination with scarves
started because my mother has always worn scarves. Classy, pretty,
striking, a statement piece around the neck & shoulders.  Admiring
anything she did while I was growing up, I quickly came to love scarves as a
young woman too.  And I began wearing them more and more often as the years went on.  So it should come as no
surprise to anyone that over the years, I've developed an extensive
collection of scarves. Beautiful, expensive scarves.  Casual cheaper
scarves. Fancy ones. Everyday ones. Trendy ones.  Long, short, and eternity loop ones.
I've even recently started to crochet my very own one!  The point is,
I've loved them.  I value them.  I appreciate them and enjoy them.  I
wear one almost daily in most seasons, and I've made them a part of
who I am.

So while watching a Wayne Dyer talk about the topic of "Change Your
Thoughts, Change Your Life
", I remembered something about an old
scarf.  I distinctly remember a picture of myself in the dead of
winter wearing a black pea coat, winter hat, and my absolute favorite
scarf of all time!  My Ecco scarf, a an elaborate brocade pattern of
maroon and gold.  It was a long scarf that could be wrapped around
your neck several times, bunched up together it looked full & rich.
What joy this scarf brought me.  What joy all the more as it was mom's
scarf.  A gift someone gave her that she gave to me.  Something she
loved but gave to me anyway, which is what mom's always do, don't they?   Anyway, that picture is the last picture I have
of it.  Because shortly after the picture was taken, on a night out
clubbing in Astoria, I lost it.  I remember the night vaguely.  But
what I do remember is how awful I felt about losing that scarf. So
awful, in fact, that I'm still talking about it 21 years later.  And
no matter how many scarves I've had since, that's the one that stands
out in my mind.

I've certainly moved on from that scarf, even though I suppose I've
never entirely forgotten about it.  So why did a Wayne Dyer video
bring on all these thoughts?  What was that scarf to me, really?  What are any of my scarves to me, really?  I guess it was to remind me very simply
that things do look different when you start to view them from a
different lens. I realize now how something I cared about so much was
not really that important at all.  I see how much emphasis I had put
on something that was just a "thing" and how often I did that back
then with so many other "things."  I see now that that is all I knew
at the time.  And that's ok.  Because that's what I needed to know for
that moment in time.  None of those things matter to me now.  Not even
the scarves I claim to still value so much.  What matters is the stuff
I can't touch.  The stuff that's below the surface.  And I see that
now much more clearly.  "When you change the way you look at things,
the things you look at change."  They certainly do.  Thank you, Wayne.
We all need reminders now & then.

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